Dry Humping Explained: What It Means and Why It’s So Common

Let’s talk about dry humping and why most people enjoy it, no matter how awkward it sounds.

When someone opens a conversation about dry humping, some may laugh about it, while some people might cringe.

It might be a common activity during sex, but most don't understand it fully, how it works, and how beneficial it can be.

And with the use of pelvic power and some humping and grinding, you can make your session way hotter, even if no penetration is involved.

We’ll explain what dry humping is next, and what you should keep in mind to keep everyone comfortable, safe, and free of friction burns.

What is Dry Humping?

Dry humping usually means when one person rubs their genitals against another, or against a padded surface, to feel good and gain that awesome big O. 

Even if it can lead to orgasm, you can dodge pregnancy or STIs because there’s really no contact here, but for some couples, dry humping can be used as foreplay or may happen together with penetrative sex as well.

Also known as frottage, outercourse, or dry sex, this non-penetrative activity can also be another form of masturbation, because while it creates that yummy friction for penis owners, people with vulvas can get clitoral stimulation from the grinding motion, and you can also grind by rubbing against a pillow or piece of furniture (just make sure it’s padded), or on your partner. 

What are the Perks of Dry Humping?

So, can shaking those hips and booty bring more fun into intimacy? Well, you might get surprised by the benefits dry humping can add to your sex life.

There’s a Low Risk for Pregnancy

Dry humping can be a good way to enjoy sex if getting pregnant makes you anxious, and since there is no exchange of fluids when doing all that grinding, there’s less than zero chance of conception, as long as you do it right. 

There’s also a dry humping pregnancy discussion on Reddit, where one user worries if they could get pregnant after their partner ejaculated on their clothes, but thankfully, they aren’t, and another user stated that even if you wear lots of layers, a pregnancy can still likely happen during dry humping.

So you might want to use protection barriers once you decide to get down and hump with a partner, even if there’s no penetration.

It Keeps STIs at Bay

When you do some grinding with a partner, it’s not necessary to do it so close, and you can just both dry hump a pillow and watch each other.

If you just met your partner and want to get down but also want to avoid STIs, then dry humping is a safer option, and if you want to take things further, you can always add strokers and dildos to your session to get a feel of that penetration, but without exchanging any fluids. 

It’s Accessible and Playful

Dry humping sex is something that you can do in any private space, whether alone or with a partner, any time of the day.

It also allows you to be more creative, like you can use some toys as you grind, or change the covers of your pillows for different textures and sensations. 

Inclusivity for All Identities

Everyone can do dry humping, whether they’re queer, trans, or even if someone’s living with physical challenges.

It applies to people from all walks of life, including lesbian dry humping, where two vulva owners are involved, and if they want a little more, they can add a wearable dildo for a more penetrative feel. 

It Allows You to Learn

When you dry hump, it lets you discover a lot of spots that feel good for you, so you’ll become more aware of your body and which strokes and movements suit you best.

For a full list of those sensitive spots, you may want to visit this post from the Centre for Sexuality to help give you an idea of how to stimulate each and make your partner happy.

What are the Risks to Look Out for When Doing Dry Humping?

Just like any sexual activity, dry humping can also come with risks, despite having a lot of perks, and let’s check them out so you’ll be more aware before you begin.

Your Bits Can Get Irritated

Because of the intense rubbing, especially when you’re nearing climax, it can cause chafing, redness, or discomfort in the area, so it’s best to grind on a smooth or cottony surface to prevent this, and if you want to dry hump with a partner, don’t forget to apply lots of lube to lessen the friction and protect the sensitive skin down there. 

Having small genital cuts from dry humping can also make you more susceptible to STIs, according to Healthline, so if you had one, skip those perfumed soaps and let it heal for now, before you get back into action.

An Unexpected Contact Can Happen

When dry humping with a partner, there’s still a possibility that the semen can go to the vaginal opening when switching positions or adjusting clothing.

And because of the accidental exchange of fluids without any protection, STIs can spread through the skin, especially if one partner has HPV (Human Papillomavirus) or herpes.

Watch Out for Consent Issues

Consent matters so much in any sexual activity, so don’t just dry hump your partner and traumatize them, and make sure to ask for their permission first.

Related: How to Hump a Pillow as a Male and Finish Satisfied

How to Make the Dry Humping Experience Much Better?

The best thing about dry humping is you can do it alone or with someone, but here are some methods that you can do to keep it more comfy and risk-free.

You Can Have More Fun With Toys

If you decide to bring some sidekicks, whether couples toys or just for one, then they can truly make your dry humping experience on a different level, and here’s how to do it:

Wearable Toys for Hands-Free Experience

A lot of toys come with different shapes, sizes, and uses, and while some come with a heating feature, others are waterproof to use them in the shower.

But why settle for less if you can experience these features in one toy like Squeeze Me? These toys are made to keep your hands roaming on your chest and other parts as you dry hump, while giving the realistic vibe that you crave.

Get and Rub a Vibrator

Vibrators are super simple and chill to use; all you have to do is stroke them on your clit or sneak it into your genitals, or you can also play with your nipples by gliding its tip. You can also tuck it inside your pillow if you like it extra raunchy.

A Cock Ring for Another Layer of Vibe

If you're a penis owner and grinding on a pillow isn’t enough, then you might want to opt for cock ring, because not only does it keep things hot, it’ll also make your erections last longer.

Wear Something Thin and Comfortable

Okay, before you start dry humping the arm of your sofa or partner, check if you’re wearing the right clothes for it.

Skip thick pants or jeans with zippers, and go for something silky or cottony and loose enough to make space for your erection or toys to make that vulva happy.

Get Those Hands Moving

When grinding, your hips and genitals do all the work for you, so you can use your hands to touch a lot of places on your body and on your partner's.

While grinding or humping, you can use your hand to touch or pinch the nipples or use nipple toys. You can also touch your partner’s face as you grind against them, or just watch each other do your thing.

Pick the Best Position for Your Dry Humping

If you’re dry humping a partner or doing it alone, here’s a list of positions you can do if you’re with someone or flying solo.

Traditional Missionary

In this position, one partner can kneel within the other’s legs, and they can initiate thrusting and grind their genitals at the same time, and let the friction do its thing.

Cowgirl (Or Reverse)

Probably a position that can be enjoyed by anyone, the cowgirl will let one partner straddle the other (lying down), and the partner on top can grind to give each other friction.

Side By Side

Another position for dry humping on the list, this cozy position is like pleasure times two, because all you have to do is lie on your side facing each other, and rub your genitals and thighs together.

Ride an Armrest

This next position is perfect for doing dry humping alone, and all you have to do is straddle an upholstered couch or chair, and ride with your heart’s content.

Works great for people with vulvas, but penis owners can make this work too; just put an extra cushion underneath to protect their goods.

Rub Your Thing Against a Pillow

If you’re a penis owner and find humping a couch uncomfortable, then a pillow will do wonders, and you just need to put a pillow between your legs and let it do its magic, or if you need something with more action, you can stack lots of pillows, ride it, and let gravity and friction do all the work. 

Use Your Mattress

This one’s great for penis owners, and they can just lie face down when doing this and rub their mattress (make sure it’s padded well), using their junk.

They can also fold the corner of their mattress, if they can, and slip it right in and grind as much as they like until they reach that epic finish.

FAQs

Can dry humping still feel intimate for both of us?

Yes, definitely. A lot of people like it because it just feels so close, playful, and personal without needing to go all the way.

Is dry humping a beginner-friendly activity?

Yes. It’s often considered one of the more beginner-friendly intimate activities because it’s simple, flexible, and doesn’t require much preparation.

Is dry humping always sexual?

Usually, yes. But for some people, it can also just feel like a form of affection or teasing, and it really depends on the situation, not necessarily on leading to sex itself. 

Do both partners have to savor dry humping in a similar way?

Not necessarily. Like any intimate activity, people can like different things, and the important part is that both feel okay with what’s happening.

Ready to Get Your Hump On?

Sure, when we say dry humping, it can sound silly, but it’s also one of the most underrated bedroom moves that you can do to make your sex life more fun and experimental.

If you just dig an orgasm but are not really a fan of penetration, this can also work for you; just make sure to keep things consensual to not shock your partner, because the results could either be super funny or weird.

And if you want to make your dry humping experience way better, then you can just add the right toy by heading over to BeYourLover to make those grinds feel so next-level.

Special Thanks:

Centre for Sexuality

Kathryn Watson - Writer - Healthline

If you need more tips to get those hips always moving, then you might want to read our guide to Pretzel Position, Eiffel Tower Threesome, and Adventurous Sex Positions Every Couple Should Try.

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